Seeing Things As They Are- Part I

"Because you felt you had something to brag about and now you don't."

This was the answer given when I mentioned to a friend that I was confused why I wasn't writing anymore. We were having a BFF moment a few weeks ago, pouring our hearts out about the mistakes and lessons we've experienced. Imagine the *side-eye* I gave her when she said this. Moments later I conceded. She was correct.

When I used to write from London, my blog was filled with wonderful stories of international travel, exotic food and eye-opening cultural experiences. When I moved to LA, I dimmed my light (or ignited it, however you choose to see it). Nothing happened immediately, there were many people I met my first few months here, who saw only the surface image. I can't blame them, I came to LA with a lot of bravado.

The hair, the great apartment, the clothing, the Brand New, Red Jeep (with personalized license plate) all became my identity. I was a self-created brand. Everywhere I went, people were drawn to me. I publicly ate it all up. Privately, I was a wreck. The money was slipping away and emotionally I was afraid and suffering. It wasn't until I lost everything that I decided to unclose my eyes and take responsibility.


  1. I love this blog... I want to see more... to "the special one"

    Writing is a form of personal freedom. It frees us from the mass identity we see in the making all around us. In the end, writers will write not to be outlaw heroes of some underculture but mainly to save themselves, to survive as individuals.”
    Don Delillo

  2. Anonymous,

    Thank you for the wonderful, pivitol quote. Right On!

  3. WL,

    Thank you friend. Simply, Thank you. ;-)