That's it. Exactly how I feel. I've reached a point in my life where I'm tired of being taken advantage of and playing nice to make others happy. The doormat that I've become is exhausted and to change anything involves first, changing within.
I will likely lose friends and associates. That's not so bad. I've held on long enough and bottled so much up inside. I'm tired. True friends, real friends, don't take advantage of your kindness and use you. True friends appreciate and respect the beautiful person that you are. This brings me to a point...who are my true friends? I thought I knew. Would have imagine that I had loads of them but ultimately you are really on your own...well... you and God.
When I investigate my life, I've made choices that have kept me small. Staying small in one area has transferred to other areas and I can see how people have decided to keep me in this limited space. A good friend told me something yesterday. She said, "Jade, Fuck it. Just fuck it." This has helped her excel in her life and I've seen the transformation in her. I'm finally tired enough to STOP small-minded behavior in my life.
Maya Angelou says it best , "You give people permission how to treat you."